Imagine living opposite a row of sound houses. Along comes an architect who demolishes and replaces them with one big building. Astonishingly, he fails to put in foundations. You suggest that the building will be unsafe.

He tells you to get lost. As the tenants go in, you warn them about the lack of foundations. They tell you the architect knows better than you.

All is well at first. The tenants scoff at you: “This place is solid as a rock, you ought to come and join us.”

Then, when an unusual storm sweeps through your street, you see cracks appear on the building across the road, while your house is untouched. You watch as the cracks get wider and wider. You tell the tenants to get out to save themselves from a disaster but, again, they tell you they have confidence in the people who designed and built the thing.

The building starts to crumble, the architect tries to shore it up, and you tell the tenants, again, that it needs to be demolished because it is now causing fatalities. The architect intervenes, says he will do everything needed to fix it, and you should get lost. The tenants stay put. The building continues to fall apart. Fatalities among the tenants continues.

That describes the Euro “house” that Brussels built. The design is without foundations. Firstly, nobody asked the peoples of the member states if this was what they wanted. The German people didn’t want it, but the big parties in their parliament did, and so Germany gave up the stable d-mark for a euro linked to Greece – which every-
one knew did not qualify – and Italy, whose claim to membership was, to put it mildly, doubtful.

Secondly, and crucially, this euro house lacks the foundation for a single currency covering so many countries, all with different economic strength, and all with different levels of honesty in their politics and tax collection systems. To be successful a currency union needs a single government in control of taxation and major spending, and it needs to have the rich parts transfer wealth to the poorer ones.

The eurozone doesn’t have a single government, and the Germans, Finns and Netherlanders are not happy about seeing their taxes used to maintain the living standards in Greece, Spain, Italy and Portugal. So what we have as this “house” continues to collapse is more and more demands for austerity, and human misery and fatalities. The southern states of the eurozone are not being bailed out. They are being put through a special kind of hell on earth – all to save the euro. A bail-out is where A gives a sum of money to B, who doesn’t need to pay it back. What is being done to the debtor countries is more debt shoved down their throats, demands for cuts that are driving their economies into a slump, making it impossible to repay debt, and meanwhile impoverishing the people.

While the elite in Brussels hold their summits – every one of them proclaiming to have a solution, only to be followed by further crisis – there are real fatalities because of their insistence of saving the euro at any cost.

In Spain, and elsewhere, a whole generation of young people are being condemned to the poverty and hopelessness that comes with permanent high unemployment. Over 25 million are unemployed in the EU. In Greece and Portugal, workers are being stripped of every right they have ever won. Trade unions are rendered impotent. People are being paid off, owed wages they will never get.

The whole concentration of eurozone policy is on banks. Whatever it takes to save the banks will be done. “Who will save the people?” is a question that never seems to be asked. The people can starve, as many do, scavenge in bins for food, watch hospitals close, see their children’s education threatened, and face death while the banks and bankers are the priority for concern. Face death? Isn’t that going a bit far? No. In Italy there are the White Widows, women whose businessmen husbands, facing the collapse of a lifetime’s work, have committed suicide. The old man who shot himself in Greece on the eve of the elections, is not the only one to take his own life in that country. Last week, in Portugal, a man hanged himself when his business, geared to supplying quality produce to restaurants, went under as a result of 9000 restaurants closing since January (there are 40,000 closures expected by December). He couldn’t stand the shame of sacking twenty workers. An architect who build an actual house without foundations, causing deaths, would be held on criminal charges. The shameless elite in Brussels simply walk away, rich, and with big pensions.

National treasures

Andy Murray wins gold for Team GB, and Struan Stevenson MEP claims it as another Brit nail in the coffin of the Yes side, and cries: “Eat your heart out, Alex Salmond.”

If Paul Lawrie helps win the Ryder Cup, does that mean we will all be mad keen on the EU?

LETTINGS agencies in Edinburgh have come under fire for charging up to £500 in fees to get around strict new Scottish Government regulations designed to protect tenants.

New rules state that 
deposits in the private rental sector must now be held by an independent firm, instead of by the landlord or letting agent.

The compulsory scheme is intended to prevent occupants being overcharged for repairs and cleaning.

However, a number of firms in Edinburgh have told residents they must now sign up to their own model, which is expected to leave many facing a £500 “checkout charge”.

Shelter Scotland has insisted such charges are illegal and designed to give landlords unwarranted access to their tenants’ funds. The housing charity believes more landlords and firms will turn to such measures to sidestep the government’s third party scheme.

One city firm, Edinburgh Spaces, sent out letters last week informing residents they would have their deposit returned – if they agreed to pay £500 when they departed their flat.

Sean Carmichael, an abseil technician, was told by Edinburgh Spaces that he and his flatmates, Stephen MacDonald and Adam Murray, would be charged for cleaning and carrying out an inventory when they move out next month.

He said: “The place was a complete tip when we moved in last September – and the shower and boiler didn’t work properly – so there’s no way we’re paying £500 to clean the place up. They’re just trying to scam extra cash off us.”

The 22-year-old, who lives in Antigua Street, said he was told the £500 was a flat fee and there would be no discounts, although he said the firm later offered to reduce it when he went to its office.

He said: “I worked out we could have the flat completely cleaned for a fraction of what they were claiming.”

Chris Dickson, office manager at Edinburgh Spaces, said that the arrangement is legal and insisted any change from the checkout fees would be paid back to tenants.

He said: “If the flat doesn’t need cleaning we can look to refund the tenants. It’s not just us who are looking at this, because there’s a hell of a lot of administration to enter into the [Scottish Government] scheme.”

Under the government scheme, introduced last month, all tenants in Scotland will have their deposits held by an independent firm accredited by the Scottish Government, which has pledged to look at loopholes being used by agencies.

A spokesman said: “The schemes will ensure that tenant deposits are safeguarded by an independent third party for the duration of the tenancy.”

Analysis

By Graeme Brown, Shelter Scotland director

The tenancy deposit scheme was set up to protect tenants and landlords, so to hear that some letting agents are using the regulation to demand checkout fees in place of a deposit is truly shocking.

Shelter Scotland has already been contacted by tenants who have received letters demanding a £500 “checkout charge”. Our concern is that others may hand over money, not realising that they are being charged for something they don’t have to pay.

Tenancy deposit schemes are free for tenants and landlords to use. Therefore it is even more difficult to see the justification for asking tenants like Sean to pay to get their deposits back.

We advise anyone who has received a similar letter not to pay unless and until the agent can explain more clearly what the legal basis is for the charge.

Tenants who have been asked to pay this fee, or have paid it, should call our free helpline on 0808 800 4444 or visit www.shelterscotland.org

THE son of a disabled pensioner has hit out at the city council for being heavy-handed after his mother was given a littering fine over a dropped prescription box.

Grandmother-of-two Elizabeth Cooper, 69, received a fixed penalty notice for £50 after a prescription box with her name and address on it was discovered by a bin outside her home in Wester Hailes.

A letter from the council warned that if she did not pay the £50, it could lead to a fine of up to £40,000 and/or a term of imprisonment not exceeding five years.

Mrs Cooper’s son, Neill, insists the box was dropped accidentally, either from her handbag or as a result of it falling out of one of the communal bins outside her flat, which he claimed are “constantly 
overflowing”.

The council, however, said the prescription box was found inside a green refuse sack outside the bin store and insisted the communal bins were not overflowing at the time.

Mrs Cooper, who has been registered disabled since undergoing an arterial bypass on her leg in 2004, instructed her sister to pay the fine.

Mr Cooper didn’t know anything about the fine or the letter until around three weeks ago when he came across them both at his mother’s flat.

He said he was “very angry” and “flabbergasted” at the strong wording of the “threatening” letter.

The 46-year-old, who lives in the New Town, said: “Given this wording and without telling me, she felt bullied and compelled to pay the fine.

“My mother is an extremely conscientious taxpayer and has never had so much as a parking ticket in all her 49 years of driving. She detests litter and it is abhorrent that the council decide to treat a 69-year-old very infirm lady in this way.

“I think there’s been no understanding on their part and I think the council has been very overzealous. The right thing to do was to go to her door and ask her to make sure it doesn’t happen again.

“I find it astounding that they want to fine a 69-year-old woman for accidentally dropping a prescription box. I know she would never deliberately drop litter.”

He added: “The letter also stated ‘at the time of inspection, environmental wardens found that the bins had sufficient space for the waste to be placed in the bin and not on the public highway’. Being a regular visitor, I can confirm that the bins are constantly overflowing due to the frequency with which the council empties them.”

Mr Cooper said his mother, who uses a walking stick, takes a significant amount of medication each day for a number of ailments.

The council has since agreed to review the case.

Councillor Lesley Hinds, the city’s environment leader, said: “Keeping the city clean and safe and reducing littering are major priorities for residents, and the council will continue to have a robust approach to dealing with litter and those who cause it. However, we understand that these are special circumstances and will sympathetically review the case.”

You may find this hard to believe after all the recent bad publicity, but Edinburgh’s embattled statutory notice system needs to be retained. It is a very good system which was designed to maintain the safety and integrity of the built heritage of the Capital.

Any suggestion that the “scandal-hit statutory notice system” should be scrapped is wrong-minded and ought to be treated with due caution and deep suspicion. The present system is neither flawed nor scandal-hit. Many people involved in it are, and that’s a very important distinction to make.

If a few council employees took to driving down one-way streets the wrong way, reversing up motorways and parking in bus shelters, would the answer be to rewrite the Highway Code? Of course not. What purpose would there be in “redesigning” the rules and having a whole new Highway Code ready in six or seven months from now. It would end in a road crash much as the “new proposals” which the council are putting forward surely will.

Edinburgh has been embarrassed enough already and no-one should be persuaded that the statutory notice system was “flawed”. The fact is that many cities in the UK are looking towards implementation of Edinburgh’s statutory notice system, simply because it is a very good system. What went wrong with the management of it is the stuff of legend – scandalous ineptitude, institutional incompetence and an utter disregard for the people who were paying a 15 per cent fee for the “service”.

Effective action is now required to swiftly recommence the maintenance and repair of the buildings in our city. Allow me to shred all the nonsense in circulation about “focus group sessions”, “service model proposals” and “performance frameworks” that could be holding up the repair of dangerous buildings.

Fifty shades of Yes Minister is definitely not what is required.

There are problems with the council’s proposals for factors and other voluntary initiatives to deal with the kind of repairs which currently fall into the statutory notices system – not least that it is almost impossible to get ten people in a stair to agree to anything.

One significant drawback is that it would incur extra costs for homeowners as repairs carried out through factors and so on are liable for VAT. A little known benefit of the statutory notice system is that it is zero rated for VAT as it is classed as a “service”.

Here’s an alternative solution. Set up a fresh department – call it, say, CEC Building Conservation. Advertise externally for the required number of trained and experienced architects, surveyors, engineers and construction professionals. Such a team could deliver the service that should have been provided under the statutory notice system – notices could be served under a Statutory Notices 2012 banner to avoid striking fear into the hearts of the citizens of Edinburgh.

The building works would remain, as at present, zero rated for VAT purposes and the new team would have the calibre, integrity and professional skills to carry out the necessary work.

The public should have trust in the statutory notice system whilst feeling rather let down with many of the people who were delivering the service.

Trust in the system will be regained once it is in safe hands. As an additional safeguard, the council may wish to retain the “management” charge of 15 per cent, but use 2.5 per cent to pay an independent project monitor to be appointed separately by the mutual owners. The project monitor would effectively be a watchdog, monitoring what was going on, asking the right questions along the way and protecting the interests of the owners.

When lottery funding is granted for other types of building projects, the lottery fund appoints a project monitor to ensure that its money is appropriately spent. Maybe such an appointment on statutory notice works is long overdue. It would certainly have saved a lot of grief.

• Gordon Murdie is a quantity surveyor working in Edinburgh

TROUBLED TIMES

PROPERTY conservation was first investigated back in October 2010 after a member of staff allegedly blew the whistle on issues in the department.

An internal audit led council bosses to commission auditor Deloitte to conduct a £2 million independent report. Police also conducted their own probe.

Following a year-long investigation, seven people were sacked. In 2011, a second investigation into the council’s property care department began. The section, which deals with public buildings such as schools, came under fire after concerns were raised about staff and contractors.

In June, 15 associates of contractors, ex-employees and associates of former employees were charged with offences including fraud, corruption and money laundering.

SPORTS stars and politicians today united to call for a permanent tribute to Sir Chris Hoy to be erected in the Capital after the cyclist secured his status as the greatest Olympian in British history.

Sir Chris’ dramatic victory in the Keirin race yesterday clinched a sixth gold medal – beating Steve Redgrave’s haul and ensuring that a journey that began on the streets of Murrayfield will end with a place among sporting legends.

It is already expected that he will be honoured with the Freedom of Edinburgh, but some have claimed even that will not go far enough in recognising the star’s unparalleled 
achievements.

Former world champion boxer Alex Arthur said no tribute would be too much, such was his pride at his compatriot’s win. “I think they should have something erected for Chris Hoy, absolutely,” he said. “I would like to see a statue of him on a bike where the most people could see it like Princes Street or George Street.

“We should have an open-top bus and a special day dedicated to him. I think what he has achieved is as big as that.”

Politicians from across the political spectrum united in their support for a lasting monument to Sir Chris.

Scottish Conservative leader Ruth Davidson said she believed a statue in Edinburgh would be “perfect”.

She added: “While I’m delighted that Sir Chris Hoy will have a velodrome with his name on it in my patch in Glasgow, I think it’s fair that the city of his birth has something to commemorate his unique and unsurpassed achievement.”

SNP MSP for Edinburgh Western Colin Keir said: “He’s been a credit to this country and his achievements certainly should be recognised.

“He should be given the freedom of the city but a memorial would be great as well. The guy is something special.”

Sir Chris, a former George Watson’s pupil, was given his first bike – a girl’s hand-me-down – as a six-year-old, and promptly broke it while attempting to emulate the BMX stunts he had seen in the film ET.

Fortunately, he had more success in the saddle yesterday, storming to victory after overcoming a late scare when he was temporarily overtaken by German Maximilian Levy on the back straight.

Speaking after his historic win in the velodrome, Sir Chris admitted he had completed his last Olympic race but hoped to compete for Scotland at the 2014 Commonwealth Games.

He said: “I’m in shock. You try to compose yourself but it’s surreal. I can’t put into words what it means to me. It’s one of the greatest feelings I have ever had.

“I wanted to win gold in front of my home crowd. I saw everyone stepping up to the plate and thankfully it worked out for me too.”

Sir Chris’s parents, David and Carol, held a banner with the words “Chris Hoy, the real McHoy” written across it as delirious fans waved Union flags in honour of their hero, whose road to stardom began at humble Dunedin Cycling Club in 1992 before he first tasted track competition on the Meadowbank velodrome competing for City of Edinburgh Racing Club.

Moments after his son’s victory, David said: “I am just so proud of him. I am going to start crying. You bottle everything up in long competitions and then it all comes out. I just couldn’t be happier for him.”

Carol added: “I am over the moon.”

Another of the Capital’s greatest Olympic champions, 1980 100m gold medallist, Allan Wells, added his voice to the tributes flooding in from across the world.

“It’s a great achievement for him, it’s great for his sport and it’s great for his country,” Wells said. “What he has achieved is everlasting greatness.”

Wells’ sentiments were echoed by Sports Minister Shona Robison, who witnessed Hoy’s triumph in person.

Speaking from the velodrome, she said: “Sir Chris Hoy is now Scotland and Britain’s greatest ever Olympian and an icon to millions. It’s absolutely incredible what he has done here tonight and throughout his career, and everyone back in Scotland is extremely proud of him.”

The Royal Mail announced last night that a second Edinburgh post box – in Hunter Square – would be painted gold in honour of Hoy today while a fresh commemorative stamp of the cyclist will also be issued.

‘His royal hoyness’

FOLLOWING extraordinary success at the velodrome in London there will be no shortage of honours for Sir Chris Hoy.

He is expected to receive the Freedom of Edinburgh, while the city has been given a second golden postbox, in Hunter Square, pictured, to mark his second gold medal of the 2012 Games.

As well as calls for a statue in the Capital, the velodrome being created for the 2014 Commonwealth Games in Glasgow is set to be named after him.

That has sparked calls for something fitting to be named after the cyclist – Britain’s most decorated Olympian – in his home city. But what?

Suggestions included re-naming Edinburgh’s World Famous High Street “The Hoy Street” as a lasting tribute, while those involved in cycling in the city have suggested installing special “Hoy Lanes” for cyclists around the Capital, and even re-naming the cycle lanes on Princes Street after him.

Other left-field ideas included turning Edinburgh Castle into “Hoy House”, renaming his old school George Watson’s “The Sir Chris Hoy Institute of Olympic Achievement” and even giving his name to the replacement Forth Crossing, which could become the “Hoy Bridge”.

On social networking site Twitter there was no shortage of congratulation for Sir Chris, with suggestions that he be invited by the Queen to form the next UK Government even surpassed by the suggestion he should now be referred to as “his Royal Hoyness”.

Of course the man himself was ever humble, and despite passing the gold haul of Sir Steve Redgrave was keen to pay tribute to one of his heroes.

“Sir Steve Redgrave is an inspiration, to be mentioned in the same sentence is an honour,” he said. “He’ll always be the greatest.”

Analysis

By Dr Jon Kelly

What does it take to be a champion?

Head

Riders will have built their lives around this one moment for at least four years. Hoy has shown repeatedly that he can beat the best in the world, but each time is a new race so maintaining confidence is key. Riders also need the mental toughness to handle the stresses

of training

Mouth

Correct fuelling is crucial for success. Even within the competition, getting this right is important. Riders will deplete themselves in a heat then need to be back on the start line for the next round, ready to go again, sometimes in less than an hour

Arms

Strong legs can only effectively drive the bike forward if these are matched to a strong “chassis”. Simply holding the bike on the line is no easy task either. Body position is also important for aerodynamics since far more drag comes from the rider than

their bike

Leg

The muscles of the legs and gluteals produce most of the force that goes into the pedal and so their strength is important. However, they also need to be able to continue to effectively produce force even when the pedals are spinning around three times per second, and maintain the effort all the way to the line. So time in the gym will be complemented by longer rides on the road and drills to be able to use the rider’s strength to optimise speed on

the track

Bike

The bikes are built from carbon fibre using the same technologies used for F1 cars. They need to be strong enough to withstand the enormous forces involved, stiff enough to transmit as much of the force from the pedals to the rear wheel as possible, yet incredibly light

Body

Overall conditioning is important. A key part of success is being able to tolerate huge training loads over a long period. This means maximising recovery, rehabilitating from existing injuries and minimising the risks of new ones. In the most intense sessions, riders may only do a few seconds of effort but these efforts are so intense that they will leave the riders fatigued

Information provided by Dr Jon Kelly, University of Edinburgh. Researcher in the biomechanics of cycling

SCOTLAND’S biggest city has long held sway as the centre of all things curry-related north of the border.

But Edinburgh’s spice maestros are catching up – so much so that two Glasgow bloggers are about to devote a month’s worth of coverage to goings-on in the Capital’s curry houses.

Trampy and the Tramp, authors of the Glasgow of Curry blog, have reviewed dishes in places such as Barcelona and Sri Lanka but have yet to explore eastern delicacies closer to home.

It seems Edinburgh’s thriving supper club and pop-up dining scenes have tempted the pair our way – not that they’re not being cautious.

“When it came to kicking off our month-long examination of Edinburgh curry, it seemed natural to treat it for what it was philosophically – a foreign country,” they said ahead of their odyssey to the Capital, which also coincides with the Festival.

I don’t care how you get here, just get here in a can

EDINBURGH might be hosting the only festival season deserving of note at the moment, but the lesser-known London Festival has been deemed worthy of a mention in this column . . . because it’s bringing an event north.

Hansel of Film – Shetland to Southampton and Back has been described as “madcap”, with a series of short films arriving in cities across the UK by bicycle, horse and cart, motorbike and sidecar, by mobile ceilidh and on board Chitty Chitty Bang Bang.

The “relay” arrives in Edinburgh on Sunday, with a free screening at the Filmhouse.

A small step for Mankind

AMERICAN wrestler turned comic Mick Foley begins his stand-up show at The Assembly Rooms tonight but feared he might not make it to the Capital from mainland Europe.

He tweeted yesterday: “HELLO EDINBURGH! Got through Amsterdam security without a single mention of my missing teeth.”

Vouching for our cheapness

ACCORDING to the stereotype, we Scots are cheap and always on the scrounge for a bargain.

Well, new figures from online voucher company MyDealPage suggest that’s not entirely inaccurate, revealing more than £3 million was claimed in Edinburgh alone in money-off deals over the first six months of the year. With an average saving of 64 per cent from a total of 148,056 vouchers downloaded, it clearly pays to be thrifty.

Meant to tell you. A big fire in Hanover Street that could have cindered the New York Steam Packet Steak House in North Rose Street Lane, had me concerned. Close to distraught.

That’s where I discovered “surf and turf”, where my connection with the Average White Band began, where I first met the restaurant’s then cheffing owner, the redoubtable Harry Bennett.

So, while the Average Whites from those days have largely fragmented, the Steam Packet can still be found on Edinburgh’s culinary map. Mind you, its spiral staircase today would be a formidable challenge for these legs.

Current owner is Kevin Watt, since December 2007. I’ve made Kevin aware of its history.

Barnaby lives

We’re all aware people today have to be dragged into church kicking and screaming. However, at Old St Paul’s, the Scottish Episcopal outpost tucked away in Jeffrey Street, they’re not sitting on their butts wondering where the customers are. They’re flaunting a banner that shouts “Hot Chocolate at Ten”. Presumably the beverage is free.

I know something of St Paul’s and its hallowed Jacobean past, because an old mate is a prominent figure there, Barnaby Hawkes. Barnaby was a popular manager of the restaurant in the George Hotel.

I remember him well. My revelation in this column that he had succumbed proved premature. He rang me – yes, to my astonishment – saying that his stunned daughter had rung him saying she’d read on her dad’s demise in this column.

Barnaby took it like an old mate. Saw him on the bus the other day. Which proves, of course, you shouldn’t necessarily take everything you read here as gospel.

A LEADING scientist has called for tighter regulation of the way cooling towers are maintained to prevent future outbreaks of legionnaires’ disease.

Professor Hugh Pennington said the Scottish Government should be investing more money in ensuring cooling towers were properly cleaned to avoid the huge costs of dealing with a large-scale outbreak.

Three people died and more than 100 were suspected to have caught the disease following an outbreak in the Capital earlier this year. The source is widely believed to have been a cooling tower in the Gorgie/Dalry area of the city.

There has been growing pressure for a public inquiry into the outbreak, a move which has now been backed by Prof Pennington, who believes it will provide important lessons for the future.

His call was prompted by information from the Chartered Institute of Environmental Health, which suggested it would be “optimistic” to assume inspections were held even once a decade at the hundreds of cooling towers in the UK.

“It’s a nasty bug, the infection is preventable and it’s a very expensive thing to treat when it happens,” he said. “Spending more money on the regulatory side, making sure businesses have their cooling towers in order, would be money well spent.

Prof Pennington, emeritus professor of bacteriology at the University of Aberdeen, added: “Something went badly wrong in Edinburgh. A public inquiry would be the most effective way to establish the facts and to prevent yet more outbreaks.”

His call has been backed by the Scottish Labour Party, whose health spokeswoman, Jackie Baillie, said: “Prof Pennington’s intervention is significant and his authoritative voice should be a reason for the Scottish Government to pause and reflect on their decision not to have an independent inquiry into this outbreak.

“There are real fears that the inspection regimes that the Health and Safety Executive and local authorities have are inadequate and are failing to protect citizens from these fatal outbreaks.”

Scottish Conservative health spokesman Jackson Carlaw said: “Clearly the 100-plus people who were affected, not to mention the families of those who died, need answers. A one-off problem caused significant levels of ill-health and public alarm, and we need to try and ensure it doesn’t happen again.

“It is critical that any investigation is transparent, wide-ranging and speedy.”

A Scottish Government spokeswoman said: “It would be entirely inappropriate to comment on a public inquiry at this time. The Health and Safety Executive is continuing its inquiries and any consideration of a public inquiry would have to wait until their investigations are complete.”

SOCIAL work chiefs have warned the number of young people in child protection will continue to rise, as new figures showed a dramatic increase over the past five years.

Referrals to the child protection register in Edinburgh totalled more than 1800 in the past year, a 20 per cent increase on 2007.

A total of 100 children were added to the child protection register before they were born last year due to concerns over their welfare, according to the annual report on social work.

Meanwhile, despite high-profile campaigns aimed at tackling domestic abuse, figures recorded by Lothian and Borders Police as of March 31 revealed there were 5300 incident in the past year, a slight increase of 69 from last year.

The percentage of incidents where children were present in the home was 45.7 per cent, which chief social work officer Michelle Miller said was hugely damaging to families.

“In terms of trends the risk to children is very significant and is increasing,” she said during a presentation to Edinburgh City Council yesterday.

“Domestic abuse is so significant in terms of the impact on both children and adults.”

High rates of alcohol and drug abuse among parents are likely to account for many of the children being removed from their homes.

Estimates suggest 3100-4700 children in the city are affected in some way by parental drug abuse and just under 5100 by alcohol.

The Edinburgh Alcohol and Drugs Partnership is commissioning a study on the scale of the problem, which is likely to shed more light on the scale of the issues.

The annual report also highlighted that the number of young people on the child protection register in Midlothian stands at ten per 1000, compared with the 2.8 per 1000 average in Scotland.

Midlothian Council has insisted that a higher level of identification of abuse and neglect has led to the figures, although the local authority has identified the area as a problem in recent years.

As the News revealed in 2009, its social work director Colin Anderson admitted its workers were as stretched those in Haringey, where failures led to the death of Peter Connelly, known as Baby P.

Broadly speaking, social work chiefs and the government have attributed increases to improvements in identifying children with abusive parents, or those not capable of adequately caring for them.

Paul Godzik, the city’s education leader, told the Evening News: “There’s been a lot of work in recent years to increase awareness about child protection and how to report concerns, so the gradual rise is likely to reflect that. If the increase in referrals means that more people can be protected, that is a very positive step.

“Sadly, the abuse of children and vulnerable adults is a feature of society, but we work very closely with the police, health service and other partners to protect and support them.”

He added: “Prevention work is also absolutely essential, with a wide range of organisations all working together to help families deal with complex problems.

“By its very nature, this is huge, long-term challenge for all of us, but there’s a lot of very good work going on in Edinburgh to help ensure that all children have a safe and secure start in life.”

IF she looks to her left while sitting at her desk in the City Chambers, Lesley Hinds can gaze at Joan of Arc as she leads a charge across her office wall. If she turns right she can, from her window, keep a beady eye on the current mess the tram works are making of Princes Street.

Could there be a better place for Edinburgh’s latest transport supremo to sit? An image of future martyrdom on one side, the possible reason for it on the other?

Hinds doesn’t quite see it that way. She has no intention of sacrificing herself or her 28-year-long political career to the tram cause, nor does she believe despite recent history – the past two incumbents in the job are no longer councillors – that she has been handed a poisoned chalice.

“I don’t think it’s the worst job in city politics,” she laughs. “It’s a challenge and I’m always up for a challenge. I find it interesting that a lot of people ask ‘why are you doing this?’ and want to commiserate, but then they also say ‘well if anyone can sort out the trams you can’. Without doubt there’s a lot of stress and pressure. Even my husband said this would make me or break me.”

That pressure has ratcheted up again since we spoke. Earlier this week the Evening News revealed that Councillor Hinds’ intervention last August into just where the tram should terminate – suggesting it should be Haymarket rather than York Place to keep costs down – actually resulted in a bill of £1.4m.

“That typifies the whole tram project,” she says. “I have asked for a detailed explanation of this cost as I recall we were told by officials at the time it wouldn’t cost anything, then that was later revised to suggest it had cost £300,000. I stand by my resolution at the time of terminating the tram at Haymarket because the project was spiralling out of control, but what I cannot understand is how eight days’ work – or the lack of – could cost this much.”

It’s hard to understand much of the tram costs and just where mistakes were made. And it is this which Cllr Hinds seems determined to resolve.

“I want to bring common sense back to transport. I think because of the tram there has been a lot of negativity about transport issues in Edinburgh and I want to change that. But to do that I need to win the trust of people and that means being open and honest about what’s going on, particularly with the tram.

“All I can do is ask the questions and get answers back to people. I’m not an engineer, but what I am is a person who uses Edinburgh’s roads and buses and I know there’s no point us saying everything’s great about the tram until it’s running.”

So in becoming transport 
convener, rather than the Labour spokeswoman in opposition, has she been privy to information she hadn’t seen before on the tram project?

“Yes, there are things that have made me ask why things were done in the way they were. I think there was a lack of common sense, and I’ve had things suggested to me recently that we should do and I’ve said no – like the tram shop for instance.

“I’ve also realised that in opposition we did not get all the information we wanted. We used to have these tram meetings at which we were just told everything is fantastic. Most of my information about what was really going on came from the Evening News.

“I was excluded from knowing things. I am not going to do the same to other elected members.”

But she adds: “I admit I have still to get to the bottom of what’s been going on and I am not letting people think that this project is something we should be shouting about. Just let’s get on with it. There have been massive mistakes but things are heading in the right direction now. And yes, let’s have a public inquiry.”

It’s easy to get bogged down in the issue of trams when it comes to discussing Edinburgh’s transport problems – she admits the council had a PR disaster over the hiring of tram drivers but insists training needs to be done now – but Hinds is keen to talk about other areas which are proving more successful – buses, cycling and even walking.

“People feel frustrated about how they get about Edinburgh, be they cyclists or drivers or bus users, even pedestrians. I want to try and make travelling around Edinburgh more positive,” she says. “For a long time the council has been seen as anti-car, but I have a car and I use it, so I cannot be accused of that. But I also use the bus and I walk a lot.

“And while I don’t cycle, I used to and perhaps can be persuaded to again in the future.”

She has pushed forward the council’s Active Travel Action Plan, which aims to ensure cycling gets easier and there are more travel choices for people. “The plan is, we’ve been told, one of the best in the country. People talk about Amsterdam and how good it is for cyclists but that’s taken years to develop, I think this is a healthy start for us in Edinburgh and the five per cent of the transport budget we’ve committed to cycling, will be used to develop the plan.

“I understand people want more spent in this area, but when you’ve got budget savings to make every year, then you have to ask which budgets should be cut in order to accommodate that? Education or health and social care? It’s all about getting the balance right.”

Hinds has a real belief that communicating with the public could solve a lot of the pent-up anger there seems to be between differing factions of the travelling public. “There are a lot of pedestrians who don’t like cyclists, cyclists who don’t like drivers and vice versa. It’s my job to cater for them all and bring them together.

“I have always believed in talking to the public about what they want. People want to know they’re being listened to, and that they can affect how things are done.

“Getting people’s trust back has to be the long-term goal. You have to be honest about what’s going on and why. I think I have a reputation for telling it like it is.”

She apparently did so when it came to bus lane cameras – getting them switched off at Willowbrae and refunding fines – and also with Ian Craig, managing director of Lothian Buses who was recently awarded a massive £47,000 bonus on top of his £160,000 salary.

“While it’s a company we should be proud of I thought those bonuses were unacceptable and told him so.

“I have always had concerns about bonuses for people in the public sector. The people of the Lothians own Lothian Buses, and while it might operate like a private firm, it’s not. I have raised my concerns. I think we as a council need to change that kind of culture.”

Certainly it seems that Hinds is busy changing the culture in the council’s transport department too. Whether it will work, she says, will only be found out in the long term.

“I want Edinburgh to have an integrated transport system with real choice for people. I know others have said it before, but I intend to deliver.”

YOUR TWITTER QUESTIONS ANSWERED

Q: Does the council accept the trams fiasco is the principal reason people avoid the city centre?

A: Not wholly, no. Obviously the length of time there have been tram works on Princes Street hasn’t helped, but we are in a recession at the moment and there’s the competition from out-of-town shopping centres as well, both of which have affected the city centre.

Q: Why are there no adequate signs on the West Approach Road forbidding pedestrians and cyclists?

A: I wasn’t aware there was a problem with safety on this road. I will look into what signs are there and what can be done to improve the situation.

Q: When 20 per cent of peak-time journeys are now taken by bike, shouldn’t 20 per cent of the transport budget go on sustainable travel?

A: We currently spend five per cent of our budget on cycling and I think that’s pretty impressive – and better than any other local authority in Scotland. Of course we want to increase it – by one per cent every year over the next four if possible – but it’s a healthy start.

Q: Why are there always so many roadworks at the same time?

A: This is a massive issue and the digging up of roads and road closures is very frustrating. I saw a sign on Market Street recently saying it would be closed for four weeks, and I thought “what for?” So I challenged it and discovered it only needed to be closed for two weeks and only in one direction. It was because of utility works for a new hotel. Now that kind of work does need to happen, but it doesn’t always mean people should be inconvenienced for weeks at a time.

The problem we have is that utility companies don’t always need to tell us when they dig up a road – they can class it as an emergency and just do it. We’re looking at the possibility of legislation through the Scottish Parliament to stop that so we can at least do some traffic modelling before a closure happens to make the changes easier.

There’s also a feeling that we just say yes to everyone and say “take as long as you like”. Procedures need to change and our inspection regime is also under review to make sure that utility companies are repairing the roads to the correct requirements.

Q: There’s always talk about Edinburgh being a model cycling city but when will it materialise? Why is there no imagination/innovation in cycling infrastructure? How will you make it safer to cycle around Edinburgh?

A: I think people have to remember that cities like Barcelona or Amsterdam have been working on cycling infrastructure for many, many years, so we can’t just do it overnight. I believe our Active Travel Action Plan puts us on the right path. It’s been praised by Sustrans as exemplary and puts us at the forefront of making things good for cyclists. And if people have imaginative ideas for infrastructure we’d be delighted to hear them.

As for safety, it’s a primary concern and while our off-road cycle paths are great, we need to look at ways of making road cycling safer, perhaps even encouraging cyclists on to roads which are quieter.

Q: What’s the expected impact on Leith Walk with the revamp compared with that of the tram works? And why is the resurfacing only going to last seven to ten years rather than 20? Why is the work being paid for from outwith the trams budget? Why will there be no trees put back? Do you support cycle lanes for Leith Walk?

A: I believe the impact won’t be as bad as this time as the works will be properly managed. People will be able to see improvements as the work progresses as it will be phased properly and traders and residents will be kept properly informed. If we say it will take six weeks then it will be done in six weeks – or sooner.

The money for the reinstatement works is coming from a mix of the trams and other budgets. And let’s face it, it comes from the council tax that people pay and I would hope the people of Leith would be delighted we’re spending £5.5 million on these works. Originally it was just £3.2m and I challenged the director to get more funding and they found another £2.3m.

As for how long the new surface will last, well that’s down to whether we might actually get a tram running down there in the future. Should we spend the money on a longer-lasting, more expensive surface and then have to rip it up, or on one which is cheaper so there will be less cost should the tram go down Leith Walk.

It’s the same with trees, so we’re looking at doing a lot of planting in tubs, though I will still be asking why we can’t have them when other cities with trams seem to be able to manage. We will be bringing back statues which were removed, and I also hope to have something done with the Shrubhill eyesore by working with artists. I do want to bring character back to Leith Walk, it’s a great shopping street.

There’s a lot of talk about cycle lanes on Leith Walk and, at the moment, the plan doesn’t involve segregated cycle lanes, but with the investment we hope to make it safer for cyclists to use the road, and around Picardy Place roundabout. However, the street is only so wide and car, bus and pedestrian use has also to be taken into account. Cycle lanes could eat into parking spaces which would affect traders and residents. Maybe we shouldn’t have a bus lane? There are all sorts of options and I’m open to suggestions of how to accommodate everyone, if that is possible.

Q: Do you still have faith in the business case for the trams?

A: Yes, I do. I don’t think things will be OK with the trams until they are up and running and people are using them. Then they will see how easily they get people around. They will be popular. I don’t think people will boycott them because of the past mistakes.

Q: Are you up to the job?

A: I’d like to think I am. I suppose time will tell, but I’m certainly determined.

Questions from:

@AlanDRudland

@davidlloydreid

@duffyking

@cmow82

@branaby

@GBLeith

@deeptulip

@maureen_kidd

@westendvillager

@duncanmaclaren

@L8PFChalmers

@Kirsten4Flowers

@urbaneprofessor

@cyclingedin

@mrewhite

A HEALTH warning has been issued to body art fans after a suspected rogue tattoo artist was arrested in the Capital.

The 28-year-old man had allegedly been operating a mobile tattooing business, which would see him travel to customers’ homes to carry out his work, despite not having the proper qualifications or licences.

Following the arrest, health chiefs warned of the dangers of using unlicensed tattooists, saying unhygienic equipment could spread viruses including HIV, hepatitis B and hepatitis C.

Erik Grieve, a tattoo artist at Tribe Tattoos in Broughton Street, said amateur tattooists were becoming increasingly common, with the industry being glamorised by television shows such as Miami Ink.

Mr Grieve said: “It’s a huge concern. There’s artistic dangers and the health implications can be horrendous.

“The licensing laws mean any studio has to apply for a licence, pay for it and be inspected. The council will come and make sure studios are up to the same hygiene standards as hospitals.

“Now people can get a cheaper tattoo from people who don’t know what they’re doing. But the reason tattoos in legitimate studios are expensive is because we’ve got to have the licences and proof we do know what we’re doing.”

Mr Grieve said studios receive regular visits from customers asking them to cover or remove botched tattoos by unlicensed individuals.

“It ends up costing the customer a lot more because we’re having to work out of our normal constraints,” he said. “It’s not fair on the customers and the artists who have spent years developing their skill and paying for licences. You wouldn’t get a mate round to do your electrics because he’s bought a soldering iron on eBay.”

The 28-year-old was arrested on Friday following a joint investigation by Lothian and Borders Police and council environmental wardens, after they received intelligence to suggest an allegedly unlicensed tattooist was operating in the Capital and Midlothian.

Dr Duncan McCormick, consultant in public health medicine, appealed to anybody who has recently had a tattoo that was not from a licensed tattoo parlour to contact NHS Lothian’s health protection team.

He added: “Unhygienic tattoo equipment carries a risk of infection of blood-borne viruses, including hepatitis B, hepatitis C and HIV.”

A police spokesman said: “It is likely that only a small number of people have been affected. However, we are keen to make sure anyone who received a tattoo at home from an individual they met in Edinburgh seeks advice.”

The health protection team can be contacted on 0131-465 5420 during office hours from Monday to Friday.

Just like the rest of the Olympics gold rush, we should all savour Sir Chris Hoy’s astonishing success.

It is likely to be a long, long time before we witness again anything like what this Murrayfield lad has just achieved.

Six gold medals – and one silver – cements his position as Britain’s greatest Olympian. His place in history is assured.

Everyone wants to know what he will do next. Will he redouble his efforts in order to compete in Glasgow in two years’ time in the velodrome that bears his name? For now, we can only wait in hope.

Today, we have broken with tradition and changed our front page masthead from blue to gold, as a small tribute to his remarkable feat.

Calls are also being made for the nation and his home city to bestow a suitable honour on one of our all-time sporting greats. Already a Sir, should he be ennobled – perhaps becoming Lord Hoy of Meadowbank – or receive the Freedom of Edinburgh? Is it too early to talk of a statue being erected to inspire stars of the future?

One thing is for sure, the debate should not be constrained by dusty protocols like the city council’s insistence that only the dead can be honoured with a statue or a street being named after them.

There are plenty of precedents of living sports people being captured in life-size bronze – although in Sir Chris’s case, surely gold would be more appropriate – including Scottish football greats Denis Law and John Greig, Arsenal striker Thierry Henry, Canadian ice hockey legend Wayne Gretzky and US basketball ace Magic Johnson.

Another idea might be a “living tribute” similar to the one which the city created for another of its great Olympians, Eric Liddell, whose name is honoured every day in the work of a dynamic community centre bearing his name. How about a Sir Chris Hoy sporting academy?

However we decide to show it, Chris, you’ve made us proud.

Bad deal

Handing over a deposit to a landlord in Edinburgh can often feel like a bit of a gamble.

The problem with the system is the lack of transparency which allows money to be withheld at the end of a contract with little more than a vague explanation.

New legislation to tackle this is welcome, but not if it means deposits are replaced with another charge.

It is no surprise that the landlords will continue to hold all the cards in such a busy rental market as Edinburgh’s, where demand can outstrip supply. It will be up to the government to consider what more can be done to even the odds.

Today . . .

Boyling Point

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• Frank’s latest book Boyling Point 2 is available for £8.99 with free postage and packing by ordering online at {http://www.shop.scotsman.com/bp2|www.shop.scotsman.com/bp2} or calling 0131-620 8400

A NEW episode in the history of iconic Arthur’s Seat will be written by the thousands who take part in the art project

Speed of Light, writes Susan Mansfield

A RECUMBENT lion. The chamber where sleeps King Arthur and his knights, to be roused in the country’s hour of need. A refuge for debtors, or smugglers, or people just seeking a bit of peace and quiet. Here, runners and dog-walkers tread where Bonnie Prince Charlie’s army slept the night before their most famous victory. Teenagers light fires on the site of ancient beacons. Edinburgh’s hill. Arthur’s Seat.

In the next three weeks, thousands of people will see this old landscape in a new light in NVA’s Speed of Light, the largest public art project the hill has ever seen. Audiences of up to 800 per night will walk after dark to the summit holding light-emitting staffs fuelled by their own energy, while 150 runners in specially designed LED suits run in formation over the hill’s ancient paths.

Another layer is laid down in a landscape already saturated with history. Now managed by Historic Scotland, it has been probed by geologists and described in novels. It is riven with stories of sleeping kings and sacred springs, has hosted dark-age warriors and modern-day pagans. Here, murders have been plotted and criminals concealed, kings have hunted and sheep have safely grazed. Over centuries, it has etched its place on the consciousness of Edinburgh.

“What NVA is doing is part of an incredibly rich pattern of custom, ritual and creative human intervention,” says Donald Smith, director of the Scottish Storytelling Centre, and co-author of new book, Arthur’s Seat: Journeys and Evocations, published this month by Luath Press and supported by the Speed of Light project. “It’s like a palimpsest. People have made their mark on this landscape and related to it for thousands of years.”

Traces of settlement on the hill go back 10,000 years, and there are few citizens of Edinburgh today who don’t have a relationship with it: a memory, an encounter, a particular view glimpsed while crossing the city. Angus Farquhar, the artistic director of NVA, is well aware that he’s working with a landscape to which many people lay claim. “I think the great thing about hills is that they can allow each person to feel that sense of ownership, but it is a collective ownership. It’s an incredible canvas to work with. It’s walked and run every day; we’re really just building on an activity that’s already there.”

Farquhar, who grew up in Edinburgh, says he has wanted to make a piece of work on Arthur’s Seat for 26 years. “I’ve got a picture of my dad, my sisters and I sitting at the summit, I’m about five years old, everyone’s face is beaming. It was the first hill I ever climbed. When I came back to Scotland in my mid-twenties, I wanted to find out more about my roots, and Arthur’s Seat was very much a part of that. When I first dreamt of creating large-scale work, it was the first place in my mind.”

NVA has worked with wild landscapes before – Glen Lyon, the site of its work The Path, Kilmartin Glen, and The Storr on the Isle of Skye, but never one slap-bang in the middle of a city. “There is a powerful sense of contrast with a wild place that is in the heart of a city,” says Donald Smith. “Sometimes people have feared the wild, sometimes they have celebrated it. People have interpreted that in religious ways, cultural ways, in customs and stories for many centuries.”

When James Hutton, the father of modern geology, began to question the received wisdom about how the world’s rocks were formed, he found evidence for his theories in the landscape he saw from the window of his Edinburgh home. Examining the penetration of volcanic rock (Arthur’s Seat is an extinct volcano) through sedimentary rock in the part of Salisbury Crags now known as Hutton’s Section, he began to rewrite the textbook on the history of the world.

The first mention of the hill in any literature is in The Goddodin, the early medieval Welsh poem which describes dark-age warriors training on its flanks. It is also the first written text which mentions Arthur.

A later story has it that a horse trader, coming home one night across the hill, was met by a mysterious man and shown a chamber where the king and his knights sleep, to be awakened in the hour of the country’s need. A more prosaic explanation for the hill’s name is from the Gaelic “ard na saigheid”, hill of the archers. Then again, a hoard of bronze age swords and spears was found in Duddingston Loch in 1778.

Since then Arthur’s Seat has worked long and hard on the imagination of writers. Sir Walter Scott used it in The Heart of Midlothian, Jules Verne in The Underground City, and James Hogg’s ambiguous protagonist in Private Memoirs and Confessions of a Justified Sinner confronts his doppelganger on Salisbury Crags.

Crime novelist Doug Johnstone uses the landscape of Arthur’s Seat and the Crags throughout his new novel, Hit & Run, from the first crisis to the final showdown.

“Arthur’s Seat and Salisbury Crags have loomed over my psyche since I moved to Edinburgh over 20 years ago,” says Johnstone. “I lived in its shadow as a student for years, and its dramatic potential nagged away at my mind for a long time. That finally bubbled to the surface in Hit & Run. There is just something hugely dramatic and strange about having a massive hill and a cliff right slap bang in the middle of a capital city. Both Arthur’s Seat and Salisbury Crags are extraordinary landmarks that have changed the way I think and feel.”

Long before modern crime-writing, the hill had an association with death. One Gaelic name for it was The Hill of the Dead. And in 1836, two children discovered 17 tiny carved coffins, each containing a small carved doll, on the north-east slopes. The artefacts are now in the National Museum of Scotland. No-one knows who made them or why (The Scotsman in 1836 blamed “the infernal hags 
of Arthur’s Seat”), but a persuasive theory is that they may have been an attempt to lay to rest the 
17 souls who met their deaths at the hands of Burke and Hare.

“There is a sense of going up the hill to remember the past,” says Donald Smith. “That is also saying something about the way people use the hill. It is somewhere to run and to test yourself physically, but it is also a place to reflect.”

This Easter, the hill provided the culmination of an imaginative journey reflecting on the Passion. The Passion Walk was an opportunity to walk the journey of Christ on Good Friday through the landscape of Edinburgh, an urban pilgrimage with a reflective guide on MP3. The steep path of Radical Road became the journey to Calvary, culminating in the imagined place of the crucifixion on the Crags overlooking the city.

Rev James Stewart, a local minister who took part, says: “The resonances were profound – a hill overlooking the capital city, connected yet apart, provided the perfect location to sit in quiet and reflect on the most poignant moment of the Christian calendar. In walking the paths, we somehow write our own meaning and value into the story of the stones themselves, so that they touch us personally. I felt as if I had really walked into the story of Easter, and that the story of Easter had hallowed my city – and its wonderful crags.”

The network of paths on the hill testify to layers of old stories, some now forgotten: the Gutted Haddie, Lover’s Leap, Samson’s Ribs, Murder Acre, Radical Road (this last said to have been built by weavers from the West of Scotland doing hard labour for their part in a workers’ uprising of 1820). Bonnie Prince Charlie’s army camped here the night before its famous victory at Prestonpans. Mary Queen of Scots’ engagement banquet in 1564 was held here. And, here, in the shadow of the hill, the Rev Robert Walker, subject of Raeburn’s famous painting, skated on Duddingston Loch.

Those taking part in Speed of Light join that rich tapestry. The project is part of the Edinburgh International Festival and London 2012, but brings together six of Edinburgh’s festivals in a project of almost unprecedent scale and ambition.

In a few years’ time, those who took part will remember. They might tell their children or grandchildren about the night they ran on Arthur’s Seat for 90 minutes in the pouring rain in a suit made of light, or walked to the summit and watched a landscape come alive in familiar and unfamiliar ways. And it will be another layer on the palimpsest, another story.

• Speed of Light runs from tomorrow night until 1 September, various times. 
www.eif.co.uk/
speedoflight

SPEED of Light won’t be the only festival show taking place on Arthur’s Seat this August. Working on a rather more modest scale, veteran Fringe comedian Barry Ferns, 35, is performing a free stand-up show on the summit of the iconic hill right through the month.

With a PA strapped to his back and a microphone tucked in his pocket, he is scaling the iconic 251m volcanic plug every day at 1pm and performing a half-hour set for anyone who feels like joining him. He’s also carrying a supply of bin bags in case the heavens open and members of his audience suddenly find themselves in need of Glastonbury-style waterproofs.

“The show is partly an explanation of what Arthur’s Seat is, the geology of it, and also a celebration of how spectacular it is,” Ferns says. “And of course I talk a bit about people’s efforts to get up there, too. The people who have made it up there will have invested a lot of time and energy, but they’ll also be a bit fitter – this is the only gig in Edinburgh to actually increase your life expectancy. It’ll make you laugh and improve your cardio-vascular fitness.”

Ferns estimates he’s carrying as much as 15kg of kit up and down the hill every day, so he trained hard in preparation. He’s not too worried about his fitness, but he reckons wear and tear on his joints might become an issue later in the month because all the extra stuff he’ll be carrying will make him “weigh the same as a big guy rather than a small guy”.

Given the effort involved in accessing his high-altitude venue, Ferns expects audiences for his shows to be modest, but if the weather is particularly inclement – as it often is in Edinburgh in August – there may be a day when he reaches the top of the Seat at 1pm to discover he doesn’t have an audience at all. What then?

“I’m expecting that to happen a few times,” he says, “but I’ll always be up there for 15 minutes, from 1pm to 1.15pm, just in case there are any latecomers. If it gets to 1.14pm and somebody’s climbed all the way up to see your show in the rain and then you’re not there – well, that’s just beyond insult, isn’t it?”

Ferns has been putting on one-off Fringe shows on Arthur’s Seat since 2007, when he played a pioneering al fresco gig to an audience of 40. In 2008, with emerging talent Josie Long on the bill, the audience swelled to around 150, and then in 2010, after a year off in 2009, a show featuring Ferns, Long and Rich Fulcher drew a crowd of over 200. Last year’s Arthur’s Seat show boasted the talents of Long again, battling to stop the wind from blowing her skirt up over her head while insisting she wasn’t a burlesque act, and the hugely likeable Joel Dommett, and it also featured a brief cameo appearance from a frightened rabbit, flushed out of the long grass by an excitable Alsatian puppy. Again, it drew a crowd of around 200.

Ferns’s previous Arthur’s Seat gigs have all taken place in the natural amphitheatre just to the east of the summit, with audience members sprawled out on the grass (he’s been uncannily lucky with the weather with his Seat gigs to date), but his 2012 shows are on the rocky outcrop at the very top – a less comfortable place to perch, perhaps, but much more dramatic, and the slightly surreal feeling of seeing a comedian performing without all the usual trappings of a purpose-built venue is still much the same:

“I think people like the transparency of it,” says Ferns. “People are sitting there watching you setting up, putting the PA together and everything, so there’s that spirit of ‘OK, this has all been created in front of us’ – there’s no ‘those guys over there’ making it. There’s a sense that we’re all in it together.”

Ferns has a long history of staging attention-grabbing Fringe pranks. In 2007 he changed his name to Lionel Richie by deed poll so he could call his sketch show This Sketch Show Belongs to Lionel Richie – a riff on reports that the Dancing on the Ceiling singer would go on extravagant shopping sprees and, rather than buying the things he wanted in the usual way, simply attach stickers to them that said: “This Belongs To Lionel Richie”.

The gag continues this year: Ferns’s Arthur’s Seat gig is called This Arthur’s Seat Belongs to Lionel Richie, and he is also performing a conventional stand-up show at Alternative Fringe@The Hive, This Barry Ferns Belongs to Lionel Richie, and a comedy flash mob event at the Scott Monument, This Comedy Mob Belongs to Lionel Richie. He’s made a free-to-download walking tour of the Fringe, too, This Audio Tour Belongs to Lionel Richie, and on 18 August he’ll be hosting a one-off gala comedy performance on Arthur’s Seat entitled This Arthur’s Seat Gala Belongs to Lionel Richie. Star performer Arthur Smith will be carried to the top of the hill in a sedan chair.

Presumably, if it’s raining, some sort of bin-bag canopy will be erected over his head.

• This Arthur’s Seat Belongs to Lionel Richie, Arthur’s Seat, until 27 August. Today 1pm. www.barryferns.com

A petition warrant for the arrest of a 24-year-old man has been issued following an alleged attempted murder in Jo’s Bar in Leith Walk on Monday.

The warrant was issued after a customer was left blind in one eye after being stabbed with a kitchen knife in a horrific attack.

The victim, named locally as Bryan McCabe, 43, had been watching a darts match in the pub when a man walked in, waved to bar staff and then plunged a kitchen knife into his eye shortly before 9.30pm on Monday.

Witnesses said the attacker then calmly walked out the back of the bar. Following the attack, shocked drinkers immediately rang emergency services and Mr McCabe was rushed to Edinburgh Royal Infirmary for treatment.

He was later transferred to St John’s Hospital, Livingston, where he underwent surgery the next morning.

It is understood Mr McCabe worked as a care assistant in the Capital.

Bar manager Jo Singh, 37, who has run the premises for more than a year on behalf of her nephew and licensee, Andrew Singh, said: “I really am shocked. We’ve never had anything like this happen.

“The victim had been in the bar since 6pm quietly having a pint and watching our darts team play a match. At around 7.30pm there was an argument of some kind.

“My barmaid, Sarah, rang me after this and asked me to come in as there was an atmosphere. I arrived and spent around 20 minutes behind the bar, everything was calm ‘“I headed away after this but at 9.30pm I got the call that Bryan had been stabbed in the eye. There was blood everywhere.”

Police immediately erected a cordon as forensic experts looked to preserve evidence within and outwith the premises on the corner of James Street and Leith Walk.

Graham Veitch, of nearby Carpet Bargain Store, said: “I saw all the CID and the forensics behind the cordon when I arrived this morning at 8.30am.

“That bar is usually a quiet wee place with very little trouble but I suppose you never know what kind of guy is going to walk in.”

Ms Singh added: “We have a steady and quiet clientele with very little, if any, trouble. Everyone was stunned at the guy who did it, I just can’t believe that he’d ever do something like this.”

A police spokesman said: “The incident took place within Jo’s Bar, where a man assaulted another patron with a knife, causing injuries to his face and neck.

“The suspect fled from the pub, and police were called. Inquiries are now ongoing to trace the man responsible.

An NHS spokesman confirmed that Mr McCabe was now in a “stable condition” in St John’s Hospital following his surgery.

A police spokesman said inquiries are ongoing to trace the individual named in the warrant and in the meantime have asked for anyone with any information about the incident to contact Lothian and Borders Police immediately on 0131-311 3131.”

SIR Chris Hoy last night blazed his way into the history books to become the most successful Olympian in the history of British sport after claiming an unprecedented sixth gold medal.

The 36-year-old eclipsed the five golds won by Sir Steve Redgrave with a resounding performance at the Olympic Velodrome in London on yet another astounding evening for Team GB and its track cycling competitors.

In what was almost certainly his Olympic curtain call, the decorated Edinburgh cyclist blew away the competition at the final of the keirin to rapturous applause from the 6,000
capacity crowd, having cruised to first place in qualifying and the semi-final.

The Scot held the Union flag over his head after riding to
victory in the race.

The noise from the crowd seemed likely to raise the roof of the velodrome, dubbed “The Pringle” due to its unusual shape.

Hoy’s gold was his second of the Games, after also winning the team sprint.

Among supporters cheering him on were Prince Harry and his cousins, princesses Beatrice and Eugenie and Peter Phillips.

His victory will bring to an end debate as to who is the most illustrious Olympian in British history. Sir Chris won a silver at Sydney, putting him on a par with fellow cyclist Bradley Wiggins with seven medals in all. However, Wiggins’s tally includes only four golds.

The gold was one of four won by Team GB yesterday and brought Britain’s total for London 2012 to a staggering 22.

That surpassed the 19 golds won four years ago at Beijing and is bettered only by Britain’s performance at the 1908 Games in London, when athletes secured 56 golds, a total unassailable in the modern era.

An emotional Hoy wiped tears from his eyes as he received his medal while the capa­city velodrome sang along to the national anthem.

Hoy was joined on the track by Redgrave, who gave the Scot a hug.

“That’s me done for the Olympics,” Hoy said to Redgrave.

Hoy said Redgrave was an inspiration, adding: “To me, he will always be the greatest, no matter how many medals you win.

“To be here and have Steve congratulate me is incredible.”

When asked about his tears on the podium, Hoy said: “I could not hold it in. I think it’s when you realise how many things have not gone so well and you have doubted yourself and you take nothing for granted. In sport, nothing is assured.

“I was going to celebrate any medal.

“It’s just been the most unbelievable experience of my life.”

Hoy said that competing in the Commonwealth Games in Glasgow in 2014 would be a “dream ending”.

“How can you top this? This is phenomenal. If I can keep going to Glasgow that would be a dream ending for me, but when you get to my age you can’t look too far ahead, you have to focus on the here and now.”

On his keirin victory, he admitted: “I’m in shock. You try to compose yourself and try to be able to take it all in, but this
surreal.

“This is what I always wanted. I wanted to win gold in front of my home crowd.

“I’ve done the team sprint, I saw Jason [Kenny], the team pursuit girls, the team pursuit boys, everyone stepping up to the plate, Laura [Trott[ today, and I just wanted to do my bit for the team as well.

“Thankfully, it worked out.”

Having picked up three golds in Beijing and his first eight years ago in Athens, last night’s triumphant defence of his men’s keirin title crowned a successful home games for Sir Chris.

Along with his previous
Olympic medals, it is the latest addition to a bulging trophy cabinet – Sir Chris has also won 11 gold, eight silver and six bronze medals at World Championships, along with two gold and two bronze Commonwealth medals.

A second postbox in his home city is to be painted gold by Royal Mail in recognition of his remarkable achievements. A box in Edinburgh city centre was painted gold last Friday after Sir Chris led the sprint team to glory, but the honour will now be repeated after last night.

Speaking from the velodrome, Scotland’s sport minister, Shona Robison, said: “Sir Chris Hoy is now Scotland and Britain’s greatest ever Olympian and an icon to millions across the world. It’s absolutely incredible what he has done here tonight and throughout his career, and everyone back in Scotland is
extremely proud of him.

“Scottish athletes have now won seven golds at these Olympics and Sir Chris Hoy’s triumph crowns an extremely long list of titles and world records.

“The noise in the velodrome was unbelievable – no-one representing Team GB has ever won six golds before, and we have never had a sportsman like him. What a hero and an inspiration.”

London Mayor Boris Johnson said: “Nearly yelled myself hoarse cheering on Chris Hoy. What an Olympian!”

A CHARITY fund worth hundreds of thousands of pounds is to be spent on an attempt to reduce Scotland’s youth unemployment rate.

The People’s Postcode Lottery has launched its Dream Fund for the third year running, offering financial help to good causes.

This time round its trustees chose to increase the cash available by £100,000 so the fund can help tackle youth unemployment.

With official figures showing more than one in five 16 to 24-year-olds in Scotland are out of work, they felt it was important to invest in projects to assist this group.

The £400,000 being made available brings the total the Dream Fund has provided for good causes over the past three years to £1 million.

The cash will also go towards projects that encourage people to be more active, community schemes and environmental initiatives.

Clara Govier, head of charities at the People’s Postcode Lottery, said: “We are opening the fund again today with the existing categories, encourage active living, bringing communities together and tackling climate change.

“However, this year, in response to the continuing bleak economic outlook and the declining number of opportunities available for young people, we have decided to increase the support available to £400,000 to specifically help expand life opportunities available for our young people.”

Charities and organisations can apply for up to £100,000, with groups including Alzheimer Scotland and the Scottish Football Association Museum Trust having previously been awarded cash.

This year’s round of applications is open to organisations from both Scotland and the North West of England.

AN UPSURGE in North Sea oil and gas activity has helped lead to a “significant” increase in traffic at Aberdeen harbour in the first six months of the year.

The number of oil industry support vessels using the port at Europe’s oil and gas capital has increased by nine per cent - from 2,580 to 2,814. And exports and overall traffic at the port have also increased over the same period.

Figures released by Aberdeen Harbour Board show that the total number of vessels using the port rose by five per cent on the same period last year to nearly 4,000 while shipping tonnage increased by almost nine per cent – from 12.2 million tonnes to 13.3 million tonnes.

Exported goods including oil and gas-related equipment, also increased by more than eight per cent to 1.37 million tonnes during the first six months of 2012. Imported cargoes increased slightly by 0.3 per cent to 1.07 million tonnes.

The Northlink ferry services to the Northern Isles recorded 66,500 passengers passing through the port.

Colin Parker, the chief executive of Aberdeen Harbour Board, said: “These are particularly strong results which once again highlight Aberdeen harbour’s contribution to both the regional and national economy, and the vital role it holds within the energy industry. We are pleased with the performance over the first six months of 2012 and are equally proud of the role Aberdeen Harbour has played in handling the growth in exports generated by the local industries.”

He added: “We are conscious of the need to maintain and improve upon the high standards port users expect and our continuing investment will allow the harbour to keep ahead of the game in order to benefit our existing customers while allowing us to service emerging markets such as decommissioning and offshore wind turbine deployment.”

EUROPE’S debt crisis, tough austerity measures at home and tight bank lending mean Britain’s economy will grind to a halt this year, according to Bank of England governor Sir Mervyn King.

• Growth forecast cut to zero

• Double-dip recession longest since 1950s

• GDP drop attributed to poor construction and manufacturing output

The Bank today slashed its economic growth forecast for 2012 to around zero from around 0.8 per cent in its May estimate.

Britain’s gross domestic product (GDP) contracted by 0.7 per cent during the second quarter, making a mockery of the Bank’s previous growth forecasts for the year as a whole.

The rate of inflation is now expected to hit the UK government’s 2 per cent target towards the end of this year, earlier than previously expected, and could slow further to around 1.5 per cent towards the end of 2013, the Bank said.

Speaking after he published his quarterly inflation report, King defended the central bank’s record on eonomic forecasting, highlighting the effect of the eurozone debt crisis and rising energy prices on previous forecasts.

The economy is now expected to grow by around 1.9 per cent in 2013, compared to 2.4 per cent in the bank’s previous estimate in May.

The downbeat outlook will increase the chances of further emergency support measures, including a possible interest rate cut below the current record low of 0.5 per cent and a further cash injection to the Bank’s quantitative easing programme.

In a boost to borrowers, the Bank signalled that it did not expect interest rates to rise above 0.5 per cent until 2015, a prediction that will dismay many pensioners and other savers.

Presenting the gloomy report, King said: “The underlying picture is that output has been at best broadly flat over the past two years, and has continually disappointed of a recovery.”

King warned that the UK was “navigating rough waters and storm clouds continue to roll in from the euro area”.

But he said the contraction in output over the past three quarters – signalling the longest double-dip recession since the 1950s – is probably not as weak as suggested.

He said the extra bank holiday in June for the diamond jubilee celebrations will have reduced output by around 0.5 percentage points and should unwind in the third quarter.

The governor also raised doubts over the accuracy of official construction figures, which are “at odds” with other survey data.

King said early indications on the £80 billion “funding for lending” scheme to unclog the flow of credit were positive, with some banks cutting their loan rates.

But he warned: “The economy will continue to face headwinds over the forecast period, from the fiscal consolidation and tight credit conditions at home, as well as from the difficulties in the euro area and a broader slowing in the world economy.”

The euro area is hitting demand for UK exports and efforts to rebalance the economy “will require patience”, King said.

“GDP growth is more likely than not to be below its historical average rate in the second half of the forecast period.

“As I have said many times, the recovery and rebalancing of our economy will be a long, slow process.”

Vicky Redwood, chief UK economist at Capital Economics, said: “The door is clearly open to more stimulus and we still expect both more QE and a further interest rate cut in November.”

Jason Conibear, sales and trading director at foreign currency exchange firm Cambridge Mercantile, added: “The Bank of England hasn’t got the foggiest how things might pan out in the economy, just that it’s likely to be a long and slow process — something we all know anyway.

“Ask a tough question and Mervyn King is quick to parry with the eurozone ‘storm clouds’ and how, in this time of unprecedented uncertainty, it’s impossible to forecast with any reliability.

“Growth-wise, the governor’s forecasts were as much use as non-stick glue. We’ll find out how the Funding for Lending scheme is performing in the next report, but the worry is that this is far too conservative a policy action.

“Isn’t it time to push the thermonuclear button? The Bank needs to do something radical and robust to get us out of this rut, not tinker around the edges.”